Bad Social Media! And knowing ourselves.

A Guide to Cultivating a Mindful Approach to Social Media Use

Author

Rafa TV
November 04, 2023

Bon dia, my friends.

Last week, we spoke about learning from our digital mentors and how they are a great tool for personal growth.

We can experience the lives of authors by reading their books and watching their movies and documentaries. And with SOCIAL MEDIA (SM) we now have the opportunity to experience them in another way: "living" with them in "real time."

The truth is that we won't escape the new digital realm. The reality is that we already haven’t; digital realms have been around for a while.

The best thing we can do if we don't want to disconnect completely and escape to the woods (there's no Papa Johns out there, by the way) is to get to know ourselves better. By doing so, we can manage this new power that we have been given.

Let me explain.

Bad Social Media! And knowing ourselves.

I have always seen clearly the negative reality of SM and I still do.

It is a tool that bombards us with information, so we get addicted to whatever the algorithm decides, which is cleverly accurate.

It understands our wants and needs even better than ourselves and advertises us shit nonstop.

It contains and creates digital abuse of all sorts: fake news, losing touch with reality, doom scrolling, lack of productivity, etc. The list just goes on.

And while it is very important that we recognize the negative reality of SM, it can leave us overwhelmed about what we can do to combat it. So, I’ll tell you.

We use SM to learn.

Let’s be honest here. We may not think about it very often, but we all coexist in this new digital era. And we are more immersed in it than we would probably like or want to admit. We are all accustomed to using SM to interact with, relate to, and live with others. So, let’s take advantage of this Holy Grail of information and learn from it as well.

SM can be a vessel that gives us another perspective about who we are and a new opportunity to know and interact with ourselves. We can use it to reflect on and decide how we want to act in this new digital world.

So, how do we do this?

Asking yourself “how do I get to know myself better?” could be a good start. I am not going to propose getting into therapy, spirituality, or vegan stuff (but hey, whatever works for you), but understanding the importance of self-knowledge and cultivating a consistent mindset about it will help us in the upcoming digital future. It will give us more control and awareness about the effects that the upcoming “Digital Tsunami of darkness" will cause.

I hope I have sparked a little seed of curiosity about this for you.

Let’s keep going.

A healthy relationship with Social Media

I used to believe that all social media creators, like Youtubers, were selfish, narcissistic people who needed attention. There are a lot of prejudices out there, and maybe some truths. But then I started hanging out with creators, watching them and absorbing their content, and I found amazing people to learn from, with nothing in exchange. My opinion really shifted over time.

Not a lot of people are aware of using social media in this way, and even more, they have no idea how to take advantage of what’s literally at their fingertips. The opportunity to use it in a healthy way is there, you just need to know how.

Ok, let’s chat for a minute about the positives of social media. SM is the first free tool to help you grow and do literally whatever it is you want to do. Look for, learn about, and apply whatever you want, with experts guiding your way.

We can be as imaginative as we want with SM, think of it like your personal genie in the lamp. You can ask him whatever, and he will literally give it to you.

Focusing on the positive sides of SM doesn't mean that we forget the negative ones. SM could be seen as a superpower, but with it comes huge responsibility. I do want to spread enthusiasm about the potentiality of SM for our wellbeing; it’s endless. And I understand how, for some people, some SM is controversial, and warming up to it will take time. But it’s important to remember that new technologies and SM will not disappear. It is up to us to work on ourselves and find a healthy balance.

There are lots of tools out there that can help us. So…

The following is my current framework to a healthy relationship with SM and the digital realm. This works for me, and I hope that it may help you. By cultivating a self-knowledge mindset, you can adapt it to your needs and make it your own. Have fun!

My Digital G.R.O.W.T.H Framework

1. G: Ground yourself in the real world, check in with yourself, and balance your physical and digital interactions.

What works for me:

  • My phone is out from 22h to 10h in the morning. Nights and mornings are sacred. Create rituals for routines WITHOUT screens. I’m not saying it’s not fucking difficult, but it pays off.

  • Find some type of movement (what I call "sport") that you enjoy.

  • Cultivate and take care of your “real-life” aka, human, relationships.

2. R: Recognize and curate your digital circle. Choose mentors and content that align with who you are as a person and the goals you want to achieve.

What works for me:

  • Put in the work to know yourself. Again, it is fucking difficult, but worth it.

  • Put in the work to clarify what you want and need from life. Figuring these out is a real thing that brings huge growth.

3. O: Observe your reactions during and after content consumption.

What works for me:

  • Ask yourself why you are looking at these videos. To learn? To work? To laugh?

  • What emotion do you feel during or after watching them? Happy, relaxed, motivated, stressed, or depressed? Does it empower or drain you?

  • Give a clear intention for your consumption and label it. I create awareness about my doom scrolling. I give myself 15 minutes per day to disconnect. There are apps that can help you if you struggle with self-control. But in the end, no app can make you stop completely, it’s up to you to choose.

4. W: Work on your attention span. Do you have control over your focus?

What works for me:

  • Incorporate mindfulness practices to create distance from digital reality.

  • Open yourself up to enjoy long format content such as books and movies. Invest in those relationships.

  • Do stuff that calms down your mind, makes you happpy and makes time fly by…a.k.a…your hobbies.

5. T: Transform consumption into creation.

What works for me:

  • I use digital consumption to fuel my own creation. Consume what you want, order it in your own way and create what you want. You can create conversations too, you don’t have to be Picasso.

  • I have learned to love the process by focusing on creating a system that works for me. Focus on creating a system that works FOR YOU. Learn it and love it.

  • Share your experiences with other humans. As said above, something you saw on SM can turn into an actual human-to-human conversation.

6. H: Harness AI and technology for personal growth. Embrace tools that aid in your growth and cultivate curiosity about what's coming.

What works for me:

  • I have an open mindset to integrating AI into my everyday life. There’ll be lots more to come on this in future newsletters, but I am constantly looking for new ways to increase my efficiency through AI.

  • In using AI, I end up finding pieces of time here and there for finding pleasure in life, instead of being attached to a computer screen.

So to help you get started on your own, the first step to using SM correctly is checking in with ourselves and setting intentions.

Our minds are super powerful. If we are doing something we are not supposed to, it will let us know in an indirect way: through psychosomatic stress, malady, depression, and others. The way we use SM can give us priceless information about the state of our minds. Watching SM aimlessly and obsessively didn't work for me. I had to go through some shit and fix some stuff (ongoing work) to feel excited and OK about consuming content. Now I try to do it with control (although, I’ll be honest, it doesn't work all the time).

Creating a growth mindset with an aim and a finished, palpable goal has really helped me along the way. If I’m going to use SM, I’m going to produce something from it. After all, productivity is essential to human nature.

More about creating vs. consuming in the next week!

Thanks for your time, stay kind.

Rafa

My news picks

Virtual Influencers of “Entities” coming in January 2024…

And for freaks like me, Elon Musk plays Diablo 4!

Cool tools and more…

  • QPNotes is an AI-powered platform that lets users from all over the world organize, share, and collaborate on AI prompts to boost their productivity.

  • Podwise is a note-taking app for podcast listeners.

  • Every is an iOS app that uses AI to create games focused on self-discovery and human connection.

  • Splash Pro is a powerful AI music engine that lets you describe the song you want to hear, customize it, download it, and deploy it in any project you choose!

  • Generative Now is a new podcast by Lightspeed VP with founders building exciting AI products and companies.

And that’s all. I hope y’all have a really nice week!

Thanks for your time.

Stay kind.

Rafa